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“Twenty years ago, as now, most couples told us they’d met through their friends or family, or in college,” wrote the editor, Bob Woletz, in 2012.
“For a period that ran into the late 1990s, a number said, often sheepishly, that they had met through personal advertisements.”But in 2018, seven of the 53 couples profiled in the Vows column met on dating apps.
Indeed, some daters bemoan the fact that meeting on the apps means dating in a sort of context vacuum.
Friends, co-workers, classmates, and/or relatives don’t show up to flesh out the complete picture of who a person is until further on in the timeline of a relationship—it’s unlikely that someone would introduce a blind date to friends right away.
An expanded radius of potential mates can be a great thing if you’re looking to date or hook up with a broad variety of people who are different from you, says Madeleine Fugère, a professor of psychology at Eastern Connecticut State University who specializes in attraction and romantic relationships.
Completely opposite of what I would usually go for.” She decided to take a chance on him after she’d laughed at a funny line in his Tinder bio.
“Whereas if you’re meeting someone purely based on geographic location, there’s definitely a greater chance that they would be different from you in some way.”But there’s also a downside to dating beyond one’s natural social environment.
“People who are not very similar to their romantic partners end up at a greater risk for breaking up or for divorce,” she says.
You don’t look like what I thought you looked like,’ and walked away.”But other users complain of rudeness even in early text interactions on the app.
Some of that nastiness could be chalked up to dating apps’ dependence on remote, digital communication; the classic “unsolicited dick pic sent to an unsuspecting match” scenario, for example.